to-do list

Yep, I'm procrastinating. BIG time. It is bad, today. My focus levels have been quite literally nonexistent. I'm totally serious too. It's almost scary how bad it has been today. But I finally just wrote everything down that I need to get done today. Or should get done. A TO DO list, if you will. And writing on the blog [only because I knew my writing and brain cramps would need it eventually] was on there, so I am getting another thing done. It actually makes me feel a bit better to be able to mark something off a list. Like I am being a bit productive in some way. Even if it's a tiny way. So I just completed a couple more things on the list. See? I can't even focus on writing a quick post. Awesome.

The thing is, to do lists may make one feel a tad more organized [like myself] but you can't fit the real-life stuf into a to do list. You just can't. This is what mine would look like, if life was as easy to make perfect by making a checklist:

• Decide if I should study abroad during the spring or summer
• Figure out what to do about my relationship with him
• Unpack the rest of my whole life into my tiny room, then get rid of at least half of it
• Figure out how to focus for just a few hours at a time, more than just once a week
• Make enough money to just travel the world at leisure and not worry about going broke
• Perfect my time management skills
• Do every single thing I am supposed to, when I am supposed to do it
• Figure out how to NEVER make mistakes
• Eat only salads, grilled chicken, nuts and water
• Pray for a love of ironing

Yup. See how impossible that sounds? It should probably make me feel dumb now, thinking about the successful and accomplished feeling I got from all of the dumb little things I originally wrote...but I don't. Because never ever EVER has anybody, throughout the history of the entire world and to do lists figured out how to fix life's ailments and problems, big or small, by writing them down on a piece of paper (or parchment or stone or anything) to be marked off one at a time, like the easiest thing in the world. Never. 

So I feel pretty okay with myself. At least I know the things I need to eventually figure out, right?